Cock And Balls Given Own Box On Ballot Sheet

ballot box

The Australian Electoral Commission has confirmed that busy voters wishing to draw a picture of a cock and balls on their ballot paper will be given an option of ticking a box next to a pre drawn cock and balls.

“We know that plenty of people want to draw a C & B but we also understand that Saturdays are busy days what with having to get the kids to soccer and ballet,” said AEC spokesperson Gary Sizzle. “Therefore this year’s ballot papers will contain a ready made cock and balls especially commissioned from cartoonist Bill Leak so that people without enough time to draw their own can still register a traditional protest vote that suggests that all the candidates are essentially genitalia.”

“You simply need to tick the cock and balls above the line in the senate plus a further five options and put a number 1 next to the cock and balls in the green house of reps paper,” said cock and balls campaign manager Uma Plums, who intends to spend July the 2nd handing out how to vote cock and balls cards at a local polling booth. “Of course you still have the option of drawing your own cock and balls with added features such as spaff lines if that’s what you so desire.”

The cock and balls party has declined to say whether it leans to the left or to the right, leaving preferences up to how voters pack their underpants on Saturday morning.

Voters have also been given the phrase “______ is a wanker” as an option and simply need to insert the name of their politician of choice in the blank space. Polling shows Malcolm Turnbull as the nation’s preferred wanker though he may not gain enough seats to have a wank on his own.

Peter Green
http://www.twitter.com/Greeny_Peter

You can follow The (un)Australian on twitter or like us on facebook.



Categories: Politics

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

5 replies

  1. Now this is how elections should be conducted 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. lol..I have just found this site!

    Like

  3. Gee, I wish I could write like this :).

    Like

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