Canberra’s Parliamentary groundskeeper has reportedly found a deceased Unicorn on the roof of Parliament house with those inside fearful that it indicates a return of the Dark Lord to Canberra.
“These are dire times if he who must not be named has returned to Canberra,” said a Parliamentary Spokesperson. “Last time he was here he launched a relentless attack on Prime Minister Turnbull that thankfully didn’t result in him winning power owing to the ineptness of his numbers man Matthias Cormann.”
“I do not know if the wizard known as ScoMo is strong enough to thwart an attack from the Minister for Home Affairs.”
When reached for comment on his return to Canberra and whether or not he planned to challenge Prime Minister Scomo, the Dark Lord said: “I will not tell you or anyone my plans. I think it’s fair to say that most Australians who know what is good for them recognise me as their rightful leader.”
“Now if you’ll excuse me I must be off to tend to my horcuxes and also organise for the banishment of Matthias.”