Author Archives
-
Dutton Demands All ABC Reporters Hand Over Their Lunch Money
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, fresh off verbally abusing an ABC reporter after they dared ask him a question, has demanded that all ABC staff hand over their lunch money to their peers (sic) at Sky News Australia. ”These ABC journalists… Read More ›
-
Dutton Promises To Make Peta Credlin Governor General When He’s PM
Australia’s de facto Prime Minister, according to the ABC and News Corp, Peter Dutton, has today issued an edict that when he becomes official PM he will anoint low-rating Sky News Australia host, Peta Credlin, Governor General of Australia. ”Peta… Read More ›
-
“Let Them Eat Yellow Cake,” Dutton Tells Those Opposed To Nuclear
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, fresh off releasing no new details of his nuclear power policy, has reacted angrily to all those against the policy (sic) saying: ”let them eat yellow cake.” ”Bloody Greenies, inner city elite and the so-called journalists… Read More ›
-
Dutton Warns Journalists: ”Ask Any More Questions About Nuclear And I Will Punch You In The Neck!”
Unpopular Australian Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has held a press conference today where he warned the Nation’s journalists to stop asking him questions over his nuclear plans, or he would punch them directly in the throat. ”Where do these journalists… Read More ›
-
Dutton Tasks Angus With Setting Up A Go Fund Me To Pay For The Nuclear
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has tasked his shadow Treasurer, Angus Taylor (yep, really), to set up a Go Fund Me account with the hopes of raising 140 billion in order to pay for the nuclear power plants that they plan… Read More ›
-
Little Plastic Soy Sauce Fisheries Close To Collapse
The worldwide sushi industry is under threat due to overfishing of plastic soy sauce fish stocks, with leading marine biologists predicting a collapse of the entire fishery within the next five years. “Ten years ago we used to see schools… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 