Niche news network Sky News Australia have blamed Australia’s rising cost of living as the reason for their shows rating so poorly. ”Interest rates and energy prices are going up, so the poor Aussie battler can barely afford to turn… Read More ›
News
Australian Open Fans Warned Not To Needle Novak Djokovic
Organisers of this year’s Australian Open have warned spectators not to needle anti-vac competitor Novak Djokovic when he is on court. ”Look, people need to respect Novak and his beliefs,” said a Spokesperson for the event. ”He is a champion… Read More ›
Dutton Tells People To Slip A Pineapple In Their Next Gas Bill To Say Thank You
Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has told Australian’s to slip a pineapple into their next gas bill as a way to say thank you to the countries gas producers. ”This country owes a debt of gratitude to our… Read More ›
World Leaders Stunned To Learn That ScoMo Has Appointed Himself As Their New Warm Up Act
World Leaders signed up to the same speaking agency as former minister for health/industry/innovation/finance and part-time Prime Minister Scott Morrison were stunned to learn that the former PM had appointed himself as their warm up act. ”There is nothing harder… Read More ›
Once Proud Stubby Holder Reduced To Desk Duties
A stubby holder that was once a vital participant in legendary nights of drinking and carousing has recently been forced to eke out a miserable existence sitting by the computer holding pens and pencils. “I’m meant to be clasping the… Read More ›
Dutton Calls On Chinese Checkers To Be Renamed Freedom Checkers
The Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has called upon the popular board game Chinese Checkers to be renamed ‘Freedom Checkers’ in an effort to punish China for the ongoing animosity between the two counntries. ”I am appalled that… Read More ›