Melbourne’s iconic laneways will be widened to a minimum width of 50 metres in an effort to make them covid-19 friendly spaces. “In time people will come to know Melbourne as a city of broad boulevards full of totally not… Read More ›
News
John Howard’s Eyebrows Given 24/7 Police Protection
Former Australian Prime Minister John Winston Howard’s eyebrows have been given 24/7 police protection to protect them from potentially being targeted by protesters. ”We have received word that an attack is planned on the former Prime Minister’s eyebrows,” said a… Read More ›
Bolt Incensed That The ABC Somehow Hacked Into The Herald Sun’s Front Page
Australia’s leading pedophile defender Andrew Bolt is incensed at the ABC, claiming that the National Broadcaster had somehow hacked into the Herald Sun newspaper and planted a story about Cardinal Pell being investigated by the police on the front page…. Read More ›
Joyce And Canavan Announce Ashley Madison As Their New Podcast Sponsor
Full-time podcasters and part-time politicians Barnaby Joyce and Matt Canavan fresh off launching their new podcast, Weatherboard and Iron have excitedly announced they have their first sponsor, online dating site Ashley Madison. “No one gets into podcasting for the cash, let’s… Read More ›
Christensen Furious That The Manila Table Tennis Club Got No Funding From Bridget McKenzie
The Coalition’s Minister for Manila George Christensen has launched a furious attack on his Coalition colleague Bridget McKenzie after she failed to allocate any funding to the Manila Table Tennis Club of which he is a patron in the last… Read More ›
Scomo To Burn All The Coal To Stop It Adding To Global Warming
The Prime Minster has vowed to destroy all of Australia’s coal after learning that it is a major contributor to global warming and climate change. “From what I can gather coal is horrible stuff and the sooner the world is… Read More ›