Day 1: A dear friend had taken me aside during my trial and given me a piece of advice should I find myself in prison. They said in jail, early on you need to seek out the biggest person in… Read More ›
News
George Christensen Demands To Be Appointed Minister For Foreign Affairs
The Government’s member for Manila George Christensen has sent a tersely worded email to the Prime Minister Scotty from marketing demanding to be appointed the Government’s official minister for foreign affairs. ”All this talk of a bonk ban in the… Read More ›
Scotty From Marketing Announces Bec Judd As Guest High Court Judge
Australian Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has announced that Melbourne based influencer Bec Judd will next year serve as a guest judge to the High Court. ”I was watching the Block this week with Jen and the Girls when I… Read More ›
The Start Of Bushfire Season Prompts ScoMo To Push For International Borders To Open
Australia’s Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has called upon his international colleagues to start thinking about opening up their borders to tourists. The call comes after the Prime Minister discovered that bush fires had already been reported in Australia. ”It’s… Read More ›
Man Who Posted Lots Of Parkour Videos Ten Years Ago Gingerly Moves Walker Over Small Hump In Footpath
A man who posted thousands of YouTube videos of himself doing acrobatic parkour stunts at major world landmarks back in 2010 was seen painfully trying to get his walking frame past a slight rise in the footpath yesterday. “HURTS… EVERYTHING… Read More ›
Melbourne To Widen Laneways To Make Them Covid Safe
Melbourne’s iconic laneways will be widened to a minimum width of 50 metres in an effort to make them covid-19 friendly spaces. “In time people will come to know Melbourne as a city of broad boulevards full of totally not… Read More ›