Author Archives
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Dutton Too Busy ‘Washing His Hair’ To Make It To The Garma Festival
Opposition leader (for now) Peter Dutton has told reporters that he already has plans this weekend to wash his hair, so will be unable to make it to the Garma festival, after being invited by the Prime Minister Anthony Albanese…. Read More ›
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ScoMo Tells Dutton Of His Plan For Robodebt 2 Electric Boogaloo
Under fire former Prime Minister, Scott Morrison, has called current Opposition leader Peter Dutton to tell him of his plan of how they can win back Government with the signature policy, Robodebt 2 electric boogaloo. ”Scotty is very excited about… Read More ›
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Scotty From Marketing Launches New Catch Phrase: ”Don’t Blame Me, I Didn’t Do It!”
Former Australian Prime Minister (yep, really) Scotty from marketing, has taken to the socials to launch his new catch phrase: ”Don’t blame me, I didn’t do it.” ”People have a lot of expectations on a former Prime Minister,” said Scotty… Read More ›
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Dude Who Just Watched Forged In Fire Declares That His Steak Knife Will Keel
35 year-old Hobart man, Richard Monks, has heartily tucked into his evening steak, stabbing the porterhouse with his knife and declaring to his family that the knife will keel. ”Every time he watches Forged In Fire he thinks he’s that… Read More ›
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Dutton Pulls A ScoMo And Buggers Off Overseas To Avoid Questioning
Opposition leader (for now) Peter Dutton has followed his predecessors lead and buggered off overseas to avoid questioning over dodgy contract processes he was involved in as head of home affairs whilst in Government. ”Peter Dutton does take stock in… Read More ›
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Dutton Defends Hiring Controversial Death Eaters To Guard Manus Island
Beleaguered Opposition leader Peter Dutton has defended his time in office as head of home affairs, including his controversial decision to hire death eaters to guard Manus Island. ”My record as head of home affairs was beyond reproach,” cried the… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 