Opposition leader (for now), Sussan Ley, has promised to add an extra S to her name in an effort to turn around her shockingly low polling numbers. ”To the people of Australia, I have listened and I have learnt, you… Read More ›
Politics
”This Is My Leader And I’m Very Ambitious For Her,” Says Hastie About Ley
The Opposition’s shadow minister for Home Affairs, Andrew Hastie, has taken some time out of his day, which was definitely not spent on the phone talking numbers, to tell the press that he is ambitious for his leader Sussan Ley…. Read More ›
Ted O’Brien Late To Work After Getting His Tie Caught In His Briefcase, Again
Shadow Treasurer (for now), Ted O’Brien, has arrived to work late today due to managing to get his tie caught in his briefcase, this is the third time this month that this has happened. ”They’re tricky things ties aren’t they?”… Read More ›
Ted O’Brien Tells Reporters To Please Call Him TeOb
Shadow treasurer, Ted O’Brien, has told reporters that going forward he would like to be referred to by his new nickname, TeOb. He has also asked reporters to start describing him as a bit of a daggy Dad. ”Now that… Read More ›
Angus Taylor Trapped In Office For 3 Hours After Confusing Push With Pull
The Coalition’s so-called potential saviour, Angus Taylor, has spent a harrowing 3 hours trapped in his parliamentary office are confusing push with pull when trying to open the door. ”It’s not the first time that we have had to go… Read More ›
Albo Says Good Morning, Sussan Condemns Him For Ignoring The Afternoon
Interim Opposition leader and practicing numerologist, Sussan Ley, has held a press conference to condemn the PM’s decision to say good morning, claiming the statement was offensive to both the afternoon and evening. ”Mr Albanese needs to stop seeking to… Read More ›