Opposition leader and part-time member for Dixon, Peter Dutton, has made an emergency dash to Paris after mining magnate, Gina Rinehart, complained that her shoes need cleaning. ”Gina is such an important person and I pledge that any Government I… Read More ›
Anthony Albanese
National Party Demands The Return Of Leaded Petrol
The Coalition’s junior member, the National party, have come out today demanding that the Albanese Government bring back leaded petrol. ”What sort of weak minded individual is Albo that he has a problem with lead?” Asked the National’s chief agitator… Read More ›
Dutton Tells Organisers Of The Garma Festival He Can’t Make It As He’s Busy Washing His Hair
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has sent a letter to organisers of the Garma festival that he will not be attending this year as he needs to stay at home and wash his hair. ”As Opposition leader you are kept very… Read More ›
Sussan Says If It’s Not Weird To Add An Extra S To Your Name
The Opposition’s spokesperson for numerology and using tax payers cash in order to purchase investment properties, Sussan Ley, has denied that it is weird that she added an extra S to her first name. ”Numerology has added so much more… Read More ›
Joyce Asks Duty-Free Dutton To Pick Him Up Some Tia Maria On His Way Back From Israel
The Opposition’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has asked his leader, Peter Dutton, to pick him up a bottle of Tia Maria from customs when he returns from his latest overseas jaunt. ”Pete loves a little… Read More ›
Dutton Returns From American Holiday Promising to Make Australia Hate Again
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has returned from his little holiday jaunt to America renewed, refreshed and ready to make Australia hate again. ”Such a great trip, I mean the things I saw and the people I met, just great times,”… Read More ›