As I sit here in isolation at the Lodge with only my 16 personal photographers and 40 strong team of media advisors to keep me company, I have a lot of time to ponder what I want to achieve as… Read More ›
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Exclusive Extract: George Pell’s Prison Journal
Day 1: A dear friend had taken me aside during my trial and given me a piece of advice should I find myself in prison. They said in jail, early on you need to seek out the biggest person in… Read More ›
Scotty From Marketing Calls Up Porter To Tell Him About A Vending Machine He Saw In Japan
Australian Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has arrived home from Japan to tell all his mates and colleagues about all the weird things that he saw over there, including a vending machine that dispenses worn women’s underwear. “I must say… Read More ›
Berejiklian Orders NSW Businesses To Pay Staff Wages In Gold Coins
NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian has ordered all businesses that operate in the State to start paying their employees in gold coins rather than doing so electronically. ”It breaks my heart that in the great State of NSW people are being… Read More ›
George Christensen Demands To Be Appointed Minister For Foreign Affairs
The Government’s member for Manila George Christensen has sent a tersely worded email to the Prime Minister Scotty from marketing demanding to be appointed the Government’s official minister for foreign affairs. ”All this talk of a bonk ban in the… Read More ›
Scotty From Marketing Hastily Flicks Through The Bunnings Catalogue Looking For A Distraction
Australian Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has taken some time out of his day to vigorously flick through the latest Bunnings catalogue in the hopes of being able to find a distraction. Preferably one big enough to occupy the media… Read More ›
