Alleged Member of Parliament Christian Porter has updated the Parliamentary Register of Interests to declare that the costs of his recent defamation case against the ABC ”fell off the back of a truck.” ”What can I say? I was walking… Read More ›
parliament
ScoMo Tells His Creepy Mate To Ignore Clive And Stay Friends With Him
Prime Minister for Sydney Scott Morrison has called upon his creepy mate George Christensen to ignore approaches from billionaire shit-stirrer Clive Palmer and stick with the Coalition. ”I know at the moment George feels like the popular girl at school,”… Read More ›
Scotty From Marketing Rumoured To Have Joined Jeff Bezos In Space
Prime Minister for NSW Scott Morrison has allegedly joined Amazon billionaire Jeff Bezos on his space ship Blue Origin on it’s maiden journey to space. ”Whilst we can’t confirm or deny that our dear Leader has made the monumental journey… Read More ›
Joyce Tells ScoMo To Make Him Minister For Home Affairs, Or He’ll Piss On The Carpet
Soon-to-be-appointed Deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce has demanded that Prime Minister ScoMo appoint him Minister of Home Affairs, or else he’ll piss on the floor of Parliament House. ”The PM needs to know that the Nationals will not back down,’… Read More ›
Dutton Says Vics Should Be Happy With Lockdown As It Keeps Them Safe From Sudanese Gangs
Australia’s Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton has told Victorians that they should be happy with their lockdown being extended as it keeps them safe from Sudanese gangs. ”All we hear from Victoria is negativity, it’s time that they… Read More ›
Peter Dutton Calls For The Immediate Banning Of Potato Peelers
Australia’s Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton has called for the immediate banning in Australia of the humble potato peeler. ”As Minister for the Dark Arts, my job is to make the country a safe place for all Liberal-voting… Read More ›
