Interim Opposition leader, Sussan Ley, has told colleagues that she plans to arrest her falling popularity by adding an extra S to her name. ”People were very interested to hear why I am Sussan, not Susan,” said the interim leader…. Read More ›
Polls
”My Polling Reveals Peter Dutton Will Be The Next Pope,” Declares Sharri Markson
Sky News Australia’s leading poll expert, Sharri Markson, has told her viewers, all 6 of them, that internal polls leaked to her reveal that the former member for Dickson, Peter Dutton, will be declared Pope at this week’s Conclave. ”I… Read More ›
ABC To Rename Q&A Peter Dutton Says
The ABC has announced today that they will be renaming their Monday night Q&A show Peter Dutton Says, in a move they say that will increase viewers and make ABC staff more comfortable. ”At the ABC we pride our selves… Read More ›
Dutton Celebrates Newspoll Success By Strangling A Puppy
Opposition leader and Australia’s next Prime Minister according to Sky News, Peter Dutton, has celebrated the news that he has risen in the polls by indulging in his favourite hobby of strangling puppies. ”As a politician you work hard and… Read More ›
Dutton Demands More Tax Payers Cash To Continue His Overseas Jaunts
Opposition leader, the Dark Lord Peter Dutton, has demanded that tax payers pony up more cash so he can continue to head overseas on his little jaunts, like the one he is currently on in India. “Peter is doing great… Read More ›
Sky News Australia Declares Dutton Will Win The Next 15 Elections
Low rating news and opinion channel Sky News Australia have declared off the back of the Fadden by-election that Opposition leader Peter Dutton will win the next 15 Federal elections and go on to be Australia’s most glorious leader. ”Albo… Read More ›