The last election wasn’t the result we were all hoping for, let’s be honest. I’m still stunned that someone as likeable, masculine and, uh, dare I say it, virile as Peter Dutton failed to win over the electorate. Never mind,… Read More ›
Rupert Murdoch
The Australian Newspaper To Rebrand As The Daily Trump Gazette
The Australian newspaper, a favourite amongst boomers, has announced plans to rebrand to The Daily Trump Gazette, in a move that it hopes will increase it’s presence online and reflect on what the paper is reporting on. ”Look, we sell… Read More ›
Dutton Demands A Revamp Of The Maths Syllabus With More Emphasis On Division
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has demanded a revamp of the Australian Maths syllabus to ensure that more emphasis is put on division. ”It is totally unacceptable that the average Australian kid leaves school knowing how to add and multiply but… Read More ›
Weird Dude Who Likes To Play Dress Ups Scores A Free Trip To Australia
This afternoon King Charles, a dude who once told his sidepiece that he’d like to identify as a Tampon, will visit Australia. The trip will be paid for by the Australian taxpayer in what is said to be a boon… Read More ›
Dutton Celebrates Newspoll Success By Strangling A Puppy
Opposition leader and Australia’s next Prime Minister according to Sky News, Peter Dutton, has celebrated the news that he has risen in the polls by indulging in his favourite hobby of strangling puppies. ”As a politician you work hard and… Read More ›
News Corp Launches Operation Polish A Turd
News Corp Australia has launched it’s new initiative, operation polish a turd, with a series of flattering articles in their weekend papers praising the performance of Opposition leader Peter Dutton. ”For some reason Rupert and his billionaire mates think Pete’s… Read More ›