Interim Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has told colleagues that he assumed that Channel 7 were asking for the price of easter eggs, not everyday eggs, at last night’s leader’s debate. Mr Dutton guessed that eggs were $4, less than half… Read More ›
Sussan Ley
Sussan Calls On Trump To Add An Extra F To Australia’s Tariffs
The Coalition’s leading numerologist, Sussan Ley, has called upon American President Donald Trump to add an extra F to the tariffs he has imposed on Australia. ”Whilst tariffs are not ideal it would help in the short term if Donald… Read More ›
Dutton Dreaming Of A White Christmas
Opposition leader, the Dark Lord Peter Dutton, has told fans/journalists how he longs for a white Christmas, one in which he can deck the halls with boughs of misogyny, err, holly. ”I am an old fashioned type of bloke and… Read More ›
Dutton Tells Colleagues To Cool The Chat On Abortion Till After They Win The Election
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has issued a directive to all his underlings to stop talking about criminalising abortion until after they win the next election. ”Though banning abortion is very popular in America and to some elements of the base,… Read More ›
“Let Them Eat Yellow Cake,” Dutton Tells Those Opposed To Nuclear
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, fresh off releasing no new details of his nuclear power policy, has reacted angrily to all those against the policy (sic) saying: ”let them eat yellow cake.” ”Bloody Greenies, inner city elite and the so-called journalists… Read More ›
Sussan Says If It’s Not Weird To Add An Extra S To Your Name
The Opposition’s spokesperson for numerology and using tax payers cash in order to purchase investment properties, Sussan Ley, has denied that it is weird that she added an extra S to her first name. ”Numerology has added so much more… Read More ›