Author Archives
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Mick Fannings Installed At Every Beach To Repel Sharks
The NSW government has reacted to a spate of shark attacks by installing Mick Fannings at every beach in an effort to keep swimmers safe over the summer. “A line of Mick Fannings stretching from Eden to Tweed Heads will… Read More ›
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Scott Morrison Still Way Ahead In Fair Dinkum Opinion Polls
Despite being caned in a recent Newspoll, Prime Minister Scott Morrison is claiming to hold a comfortable lead in the Fair Dinkum poll. “There are two types of opinion poll, the ones where they take a scientific approach and sample… Read More ›
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Scott Morrison Hires Alf From “Home And Away” As Speechwriter
The Prime Minister has hired caravan park owner Alf Stewart as his new speech writer, replacing his current team of university educated policy wonks with their big long words that the average dad at the netball doesn’t want to hear…. Read More ›
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Teary-Eyed Dave Warner Cops Brutal “More Dots Than A Dalmatian” Sledge
Banned Australian opening batsman Dave Warner has revealed that he walked off the cricket pitch last weekend after a slips fieldsman taunted him with a heartless call of “more dots than a dalmatian” after he’d played out a maiden over…. Read More ›
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Sydney Faces Crash In Conversations About Housing Prices
The amount of conversations about housing prices reached a 10-year low at barbecues all around Sydney on the weekend, a sign that the housing conversation boom may be over. “Spring is usually the peak time for wankers to boast about… Read More ›
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Fake Email Claims Dave Sharma Is Member Of Liberal Party
The dirty tricks employed in the Wentworth by-election campaign have sunk even lower after voters were sent a fake email that linked candidate Dave Sharma to the Liberal Party. “This is a crude effort to discredit me, definitely the work… Read More ›
