Author Archives
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AFP Tells Sky News That They Don’t Rate High Enough To Warrant Being Raided
The Australian Federal Police have told the Sky News network that their ratings are just not high enough to warrant them being raided. “Look we just can’t go around raiding everyone, well at least not until we got more funding… Read More ›
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AFP Raids Matthias Cormann’s Office In Search For Dodgy Calculator
The Australian Federal Police has raided Minister for Finance Matthias Cormann’s parliamentary office in what insiders are claiming is a search to locate the dodgy calculator that the Senator used to calculate the numbers for the Minister for the Dark… Read More ›
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Didgeridoo Finds Permanent Home In Rear Of Danish Garage
After being carefully nurtured through a nine month tour of Australia in a tube of bubble wrap, a didgeridoo has at last been settled into its final resting place up the back of some garage in Copenhagen. “Nothing says I’m… Read More ›
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Very Fast Sushi Train Will Deliver Salmon Roll From Melbourne To Sydney In Under Three Hours
The government has commissioned a feasibility study to look into the construction of a Very Fast Sushi Train down the eastern seaboard, raising hopes that sushi aficionados in Brisbane will be able to sample a frilled scallop nigiri that has… Read More ›
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Experts Say Aussies Still Way Behind America In ‘Electing Nuts’ Stakes
With the final election results for Australia’s 2019 Elections in, it has become apparent that Australia has yet again come in second to the United States when voting for crazy extremists who couldn’t actually care less about the people of… Read More ›
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Doctors Fear Vaping Is Re-Normalising Being A Wanker Amongst Young People
Medical authorities have warned that the popularity of e-cigarettes is leading to a resurgence of wankerhood amongst young users, winding back decades of anti wankerness campaigning. “The evidence is overwhelming that vaping is a gateway to riding around the city… Read More ›
