Author Archives
-
Palmer Not Sure What To Spend His Millions On Now That He Can’t Buy Politicians
National treasure (yep, he officially is), Clive Palmer, has been seen walking aimlessly around Indooroopilly shopping centre trying to decide what to splash his cash on now that spending money on politicians is no longer an option. ”Poor Clive, he… Read More ›
-
Barnaby Tells Dutton To Leave The Swinging Voters To Me
The Opposition’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has told his colleagues that he is ready to fight the next election and promises his leader, Peter Dutton, that he will handle the Nation’s swinging voters. ”When you… Read More ›
-
Gina Asks Her Swimmers If One Of Them Could Start A Podcast Like That Lovely Joe Rogan Fellow
Peter Dutton’s traditional owner, Gina Rinehart, has put the call out to all the swimmers she ‘sponsors’ to ask if one of them could be so kind as to start a podcast. Preferably a podcast similar in style and reach… Read More ›
-
Coalition Hires Focus Group To Help Decide Which Minority It Should Accuse Of Eating Cats And Dogs
The Peter Dutton led Coalition, spurred on by Donald Trump’s US election win, have started their Australian election campaign early by employing focus groups to help them decide which minority group it should accuse of eating cats and dogs. ”Donald… Read More ›
-
Rinehart Orders Dutton To Get An Orange Spray Tan ASAP
Peter Dutton’s traditional owner, Gina Rinehart, has taken time out of her Donald Trump themed celebrations to get on the phone and demand that her favourite toy, Dutton, get an orange spray tan ASAP. ”As leader of the Coalition I… Read More ›
-
Sky News Says American Election Proof Dutton Needs To Go Further Right
Low-rating cable channel, Sky news Australia, has taken a moment out from their Trumpian celebrations to launch a plea to Australian Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, to move further right on his policies. ”Peter needs to stop trying to appease the… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 