Author Archives
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ScoMo Happy To Leave The Court With His Pants Not On Fire
Former Australian Prime Minister (yep, really), Scott Morrison, has left court after testifying in the Linda Reynolds defamation case, telling friends that he’s relieved to get out of there with his pants not on fire. ”Never good to be in… Read More ›
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Albo claims he’s a “$1.20 chance” Of Fixing Up This Gambling Thing
Prime Minister, until Bill Shorten finds his knife collection, Anthony Albanese, has told colleagues that he’s a $1.20 chance of fixing up this gambling thing that everyone seems so bothered about. ”Albo is confident, you know the Rabbitoh’s haven’t had… Read More ›
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Dutton Makes An Emergency Dash To Paris As Gina Needs Her Shoes Cleaned
Opposition leader and part-time member for Dixon, Peter Dutton, has made an emergency dash to Paris after mining magnate, Gina Rinehart, complained that her shoes need cleaning. ”Gina is such an important person and I pledge that any Government I… Read More ›
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Nation Stunned That An Australian Olympic Hockey Player Could Afford Cocaine
Australia has reacted strongly to news overnight that an Olympic hockey player has been caught trying to purchase cocaine. With the majority of people stunned to learn that the athlete could actually afford the cocaine. ”Mate, aren’t these guys always… Read More ›
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NSW Govt Tells Workers To Get Back To The Office Or Your Local Pokies Den
The NSW Government has today realised that they won’t be facing an election anytime soon, so they’ve got on their soapbox and demanded that the State’s public servants return to working in the office or their local pokies den. ”We’ve… Read More ›
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National Party Demands The Return Of Leaded Petrol
The Coalition’s junior member, the National party, have come out today demanding that the Albanese Government bring back leaded petrol. ”What sort of weak minded individual is Albo that he has a problem with lead?” Asked the National’s chief agitator… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 