This Page Left Intentionally Blank.
Politics
Dutton’s Colleagues Relieved To Be Reunited With Their Loved Ones
Following his ascension to leader of the Opposition, the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has released his colleagues loved ones from the holding cells in his lair deep in the bowels of Parliament house. ”I’m a big believer in insurance, whether… Read More ›
Barnaby Denies Giving Littleproud A Wedgie
Aspiring shadow Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce has denied giving his colleague David Littleproud a wedgie this morning and insisted it was just a miscommunication. ”Look David asked me if his tie was straight and it wasn’t, so I… Read More ›
“Just Call Me The Big C,” Says Dutton In Pitch To Conservative Voters
Aspiring Opposition leader and a man that our Lawyers say does not resemble Lord Voldemort Peter Dutton has told conservative voters that he is one of them and they should refer to him as the Big C. ”A lot of… Read More ›
“My Husband Is Not A Monster” Says Kirilly Dutton As She Throws Sackful Of Offal Into His Cellar
The wife of aspiring Opposition leader Peter Dutton has denied that her husband is a monster who prowls the neighbourhood after dark feeding on small mammals, saying he is just a misunderstood knockabout bloke who loves making dad jokes with… Read More ›
Barnaby Tells Dutton: ”No Coalition As Long As There’s A Bonk Ban”
Aspiring shadow Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce has told the soon to be minted Opposition leader Peter Dutton to not expect to form a Coalition with the Nationals as long as the bonk ban still stands. ”Peter, gee it’s… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 