Opposition leader Peter Dutton (yep, really) has expressed shock to his advisors after they told him that the general public wasn’t as into puppy strangling as a hobby as he was. ”Peter is still getting used to being the front… Read More ›
Election
ScoMo Asks Dutton If He Wants Any Of His Curry Recipes
Australia’s former Prime Minister (LOL) Scotty who was fired from marketing has taken a break from squatting at Kirribilli to reach out to new Opposition leader Peter Dutton to see if he wants any of his infamous curry recipes. ”Being… Read More ›
Barnaby Denies Giving Littleproud A Wedgie
Aspiring shadow Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce has denied giving his colleague David Littleproud a wedgie this morning and insisted it was just a miscommunication. ”Look David asked me if his tie was straight and it wasn’t, so I… Read More ›
“Just Call Me The Big C,” Says Dutton In Pitch To Conservative Voters
Aspiring Opposition leader and a man that our Lawyers say does not resemble Lord Voldemort Peter Dutton has told conservative voters that he is one of them and they should refer to him as the Big C. ”A lot of… Read More ›
“My Husband Is Not A Monster” Says Kirilly Dutton As She Throws Sackful Of Offal Into His Cellar
The wife of aspiring Opposition leader Peter Dutton has denied that her husband is a monster who prowls the neighbourhood after dark feeding on small mammals, saying he is just a misunderstood knockabout bloke who loves making dad jokes with… Read More ›
Barnaby Tells Dutton: ”No Coalition As Long As There’s A Bonk Ban”
Aspiring shadow Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce has told the soon to be minted Opposition leader Peter Dutton to not expect to form a Coalition with the Nationals as long as the bonk ban still stands. ”Peter, gee it’s… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 