Australian opposition leader, Peter ‘Donald’ Dutton, has ordered his right-hand person, Jacinta Nampijinpa Price to get in contact with Donald Trump and do a deal to make Australia the 51st state of America ”Australia needs strong leadership and I am… Read More ›
Insiders
Dutton Chuffed That Trump Followed His Lead And Performed A Policy Backflip
Australian Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has been seen on the campaign trail with a spring in his step, following news overnight that his idol, President Trump, took inspiration from him and performed a policy backflip over imposing tariffs on the… Read More ›
Barnaby Asks Whose Leg He Has To Hump To Be Allowed Out On To The Campaign Trail
Peter Dutton’s hand picked shadow minister for home affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has seemingly been sidetracked this election campaign. With the member for New England heard to be asking those around him, whose leg he has to hump in order to… Read More ›
Sky News Hoping Leader’s Debate Will Help Them Smash Their Station Record Of 16 Viewers
Low-rating pay-tv channel, Sky News Australia, has been inexplicably chosen to host the first leader’s debate between Prime Minister Anthony Albanese and Opposition leader Temu Trump. Station bosses are hoping that the debate will help the station break their all-time… Read More ›
Dutton Recharged And Ready After Spending The Weekend Hurting People
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has told colleagues that he is refreshed and ready to hit the campaign trail after spending the weekend indulging in his favorite hobby, physically hurting people. ”Look, week one wasn’t my best, but, I think we… Read More ›
Dutton Calls For Parliament To Sit In The City That Bids The Most For It
Aspiring Mr Harbourside Mansion, Peter Dutton, has called for Parliament to be moved from Canberra and placed in the town that bids the most to host it, like the NRL do with their Grand Final. ”Who wants to go to… Read More ›