Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton has strenuously denied being the one armed man that killed The Fugitive Dr Richard Kimble’s wife in the early 90’s movie. “These claims are baseless, sure I currently do have one arm due… Read More ›
Politics
Liberal Party Change Their Constitution To Make It Impossible To Unseat A Sitting Craig Kelly
Scott Morrison’s Liberal Government has held an emergency meeting overnight to change the constitution of the party to ensure that no sitting Craig Kelly is ever unseated in a pre-selection battle. “We’ve listened to the people and by people I… Read More ›
Craig Kelly To Switch Jobs With Wayne Bennett And Coach the Broncos
In an effort to quell the furor over the pre-selection of conservative firebrand Craig Kelly for the upcoming election, Primer Minister Scott Morrison has done a deal that will land Kelly at the Broncos and Bennett as the Liberal candidate… Read More ›
Liberal Party Reaches Out To Dick Smith To Run For Them As They Believe Parliament Needs More Dicks
Scott Morrison’s Liberal party has reached out to former Australian of the year recipient Dick Smith in an effort to convince him to run for them as a candidate. With the party under the belief that parliament is in the… Read More ›
Release Herpes Into Parliament Now, Joyce Urges
Special envoy for the drought Barnaby Joyce is pushing for the immediate release of a deadly herpes virus into parliament despite scientific warnings against it. “Look Parliament house is plagued and the only way you get rid of a plague… Read More ›
Scott Morrison Hires Alf From “Home And Away” As Speechwriter
The Prime Minister has hired caravan park owner Alf Stewart as his new speech writer, replacing his current team of university educated policy wonks with their big long words that the average dad at the netball doesn’t want to hear…. Read More ›
