The author of the classic “To Kill A Mockingbird”, Harper Lee, has shocked fans by admitting that her upcoming novel will be a work of fan fiction based on characters from the popular vampire fiction franchise “Twilight”.
“I know people were hoping my new work would be about the further adventures of lawyer Atticus Finch and his daughter Scout and that creepy kid who grew up to be Truman Capote”, said Lee in southern drawl as she relaxed on the tyre swing outside her mouldy wooden home. “But let’s face it, those characters have been irreversibly desecrated after Bruce Willis started naming his kids after them and I’d much rather be writing about sparkly vampires.”
Early drafts of the work are full of chapters where a young man described very much like Twilight protagonist Edward Cullen spends many sweaty hours busting up chifforobes.
Meanwhile publishers in New York City have proudly announced that a new manuscript from reclusive author of “The Catcher In The Rye” JD Salinger has been found. It details the adventures of a prim young girl who goes to work for a mysterious Mr Grey and finds herself embroiled in a murky world of god damned phonies and sado masochistic sex.
Peter Green
www.twitter.com/Greeny_Peter
You can follow The (un)Australian on twitter or like us on facebook.
Categories: Arts
Chris Minns: 10 Iconic Buildings I’d Like To Turn Into A Pokies Den 
Music Fans In Uproar As ‘Bound For Botany Bay’ Wins Hottest 100 Of 1788 
Pub Trivia Answer Secretly Changed 
Couple With Stroller At Vivid Make 200,000 New Enemies In One Night 
The (un)Australian 