An absolute waste of atoms has heroically pushed his way through the crowd at the site of a horrific accident to administer some wellness to the seriously injured victim. “Stand aside everyone, I’m a qualified wellness blogger,” said grade a… Read More ›
A medieval peasant is continuing to soldier on at work with a heavy dose of bubonic plague despite being urged to take a few days off by his boss and fellow workers. “I noticed on Friday afternoon that Gary was… Read More ›
A judge has sentenced a Sydney couple to 10 years hard labour for the crime of “Being A Thoroughly Entitled Dickhead” after they brought a pram to the annual Festival of Being Crushed in a Crowd, popularly known as “Vivid”…. Read More ›
The Australian Government has announced plans to issue all Australian School students with a commemorative lump of coal to celebrate the Morrison Government’s re-election. “We are so blessed in this country to have resources a plenty so why not give… Read More ›
Medical authorities have warned that the popularity of e-cigarettes is leading to a resurgence of wankerhood amongst young users, winding back decades of anti wankerness campaigning. “The evidence is overwhelming that vaping is a gateway to riding around the city… Read More ›
The shrinking size of Wagon Wheels is proof that the universe has stopped expanding, according to Nobel Prize winning physicists working at the Hadron Collider. “Judging by the relative width and thickness of Wagon Wheels, we speculate that the universe… Read More ›
