One Nation leader Pauline Hanson has demanded that Australia slow down its immigration rate until she’s had a chance to catch up on hating all the immigrants that are already here. “There’re whole groups of migrants that I haven’t got… Read More ›
The unAustralian
After Usain Bolt, A-League Clubs Reportedly Chasing Melbourne Cup Winner Rekindling
Rekindling, the British-born racehorse who won the 2017 Melbourne Cup, is reportedly being chased by several A-League clubs ahead of the start of Australia’s premier soccer competition. The clubs are said to be keen for a combination of eye-catching speed… Read More ›
‘Dry July’ Epidemic Has Man Panicking About Prospects For Weekend Drinks
All week, 31-year-old accounts manager Brad Manning has watched his Facebook feed with growing despair as friend-after-friend has enthusiastically declared their commitment to “Dry July”. Now, with Friday knock off rapidly approaching, Mr Manning has been left entirely unsure who’s… Read More ›
The (un)Australian Guide To Who To Follow In The World Cup After Australia Get Knocked Out Next Friday
Unless you’re that knob in the office who still thinks saying “sportsball” is the epitome of cool you’re going to have to try and get a little bit excited about the soccer World Cup. (Yes I know, but saying “football,… Read More ›
Bloke Stomping Through Train Carriages Wants To Know What You’re Looking At
Michael Harris is looking as intently as he can at his phone. The 25-year-old accounting firm intern on Sydney’s inner-west train line thinks he‘s done everything possible to avoid any risk of contact with the bald, topless and shoe-less bloke… Read More ›
Police Investigate Garden Hose Thefts at Parliament House
The lawns at Parliament House in Canberra are at risk of dying off as gardeners have found themselves unable to water the grassy hills. Staff have complained that hoses used to water the iconic hills have been cut and stolen…. Read More ›
