Peter Dutton’s traditional owner, Gina Rinehart, has taken time out of her Donald Trump themed celebrations to get on the phone and demand that her favourite toy, Dutton, get an orange spray tan ASAP. ”As leader of the Coalition I… Read More ›
America
Sky News Says American Election Proof Dutton Needs To Go Further Right
Low-rating cable channel, Sky news Australia, has taken a moment out from their Trumpian celebrations to launch a plea to Australian Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, to move further right on his policies. ”Peter needs to stop trying to appease the… Read More ›
Robert Kennedy Jr Promises To Make Tin Foil Hats Mandatory Should Trump Win
Donald Trump’s favorite conspiracy theorist, Robert Kennedy JR, has promised to make tin foil hats mandatory for all Americans, should Trump win the Presidency. ”We can’t have good honest Americans walking around with their thoughts unprotected,” said Robert Kennedy Jr…. Read More ›
QLD LNP Promises To Desex The Cast Of Bluey
The Queensland Liberal/National Party (LNP) have today announced plans to desex the cast of popular TV show Bluey, should they win the upcoming election. ”I’m sure the people of Queensland will agree that it is time to take back the… Read More ›
Joyce Asks Duty-Free Dutton To Pick Him Up Some Tia Maria On His Way Back From Israel
The Opposition’s shadow minister for home and foreign affairs, Barnaby Joyce, has asked his leader, Peter Dutton, to pick him up a bottle of Tia Maria from customs when he returns from his latest overseas jaunt. ”Pete loves a little… Read More ›
Dutton Returns From American Holiday Promising to Make Australia Hate Again
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has returned from his little holiday jaunt to America renewed, refreshed and ready to make Australia hate again. ”Such a great trip, I mean the things I saw and the people I met, just great times,”… Read More ›