Opposition leader and Australia’s next Prime Minister according to Sky News, Peter Dutton, has celebrated the news that he has risen in the polls by indulging in his favourite hobby of strangling puppies. ”As a politician you work hard and… Read More ›
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Sales Of Coat Hangers Tipped To Boom Should The QLD LNP Win Government
Coat hanger producers are talking up the prospect of a sales boom in the Australian state of Queensland, should the LNP party form Government following the upcoming election. ”It really is the golden age of coathangers,” said coat hanger manufacturer… Read More ›
QLD LNP Promises To Desex The Cast Of Bluey
The Queensland Liberal/National Party (LNP) have today announced plans to desex the cast of popular TV show Bluey, should they win the upcoming election. ”I’m sure the people of Queensland will agree that it is time to take back the… Read More ›
Dutton Demands All ABC Reporters Hand Over Their Lunch Money
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, fresh off verbally abusing an ABC reporter after they dared ask him a question, has demanded that all ABC staff hand over their lunch money to their peers (sic) at Sky News Australia. ”These ABC journalists… Read More ›
Dutton Promises To Make Peta Credlin Governor General When He’s PM
Australia’s de facto Prime Minister, according to the ABC and News Corp, Peter Dutton, has today issued an edict that when he becomes official PM he will anoint low-rating Sky News Australia host, Peta Credlin, Governor General of Australia. ”Peta… Read More ›
“Let Them Eat Yellow Cake,” Dutton Tells Those Opposed To Nuclear
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, fresh off releasing no new details of his nuclear power policy, has reacted angrily to all those against the policy (sic) saying: ”let them eat yellow cake.” ”Bloody Greenies, inner city elite and the so-called journalists… Read More ›