Opposition leader and part-time member for Dixon, Peter Dutton, has made an emergency dash to Paris after mining magnate, Gina Rinehart, complained that her shoes need cleaning. ”Gina is such an important person and I pledge that any Government I… Read More ›
Australia
Nation Stunned That An Australian Olympic Hockey Player Could Afford Cocaine
Australia has reacted strongly to news overnight that an Olympic hockey player has been caught trying to purchase cocaine. With the majority of people stunned to learn that the athlete could actually afford the cocaine. ”Mate, aren’t these guys always… Read More ›
Sussan Says If It’s Not Weird To Add An Extra S To Your Name
The Opposition’s spokesperson for numerology and using tax payers cash in order to purchase investment properties, Sussan Ley, has denied that it is weird that she added an extra S to her first name. ”Numerology has added so much more… Read More ›
Andrew Bolt Threatens To Resign, Shocking All 3 Of His Viewers
A man found guilty of breaching the racial discrimination act yet somehow given a news show to host, Andrew Bolt, has shocked his viewers, all 3 of them, by threatening to resign should James Murdoch become his boss. ”How dare… Read More ›
Office Know-It-All Moves On From Trump Assassination Attempt To The Olympics
Steve from Accounts, otherwise known as the office-know-it-all, has been spotted hanging out in the break room flicking through an Olympic program in an attempt to lure people in to a one-sided chat about the Paris Olympics. ”Last month it… Read More ›
Dutton Returns From American Holiday Promising to Make Australia Hate Again
Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has returned from his little holiday jaunt to America renewed, refreshed and ready to make Australia hate again. ”Such a great trip, I mean the things I saw and the people I met, just great times,”… Read More ›