The man who walked out on Prime Minister Kevin Rudd’s apology to the stolen generation, Peter Dutton, has demanded that all Australians celebrate Australia Day with gusto, or else. ”I, and my good friends at News Corp have decided that… Read More ›
Dark Lord
Angus Assures Australia That He’ll Make A Great Treasurer As He Has All His Fingers And Toes To Count With
The Opposition’s shadow Treasurer (yep, he’s the best they could manage), Angus Taylor, has moved to assure the Nation that he’ll make a great Treasurer, as he has all his fingers and toes to count with. ”Australian’s need to rest… Read More ›
Dutton Furious That Cumberland Council Stole His Election Ban/Plan
Opposition leader, the Dark Lord Peter Dutton, has spent the day seething after learning that Cumberland city council had stolen his idea to start banning LGBTQIA+ based books in the local library. ”Peter is not a happy man at the… Read More ›
Dutton Defends Hiring Controversial Death Eaters To Guard Manus Island
Beleaguered Opposition leader Peter Dutton has defended his time in office as head of home affairs, including his controversial decision to hire death eaters to guard Manus Island. ”My record as head of home affairs was beyond reproach,” cried the… Read More ›
Dutton Defends Ordering Gold Spinner Rims For Australia’s Tanks
Aspiring Prime Minister (yep, really) the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has defended his record as Defence Minister, claiming that Australia needed tanks with gold spinning rims. ”I will not sit by and have my record besmirched by the Labor party,… Read More ›
Dutton Tells 4 Corners Producers He’ll Release Their Loved Ones Once He Sees The Ratings
Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has told the producers of ABC’s 4 Corners that he will release their loved ones from captivity the moment he sees the ratings for last night’s show. ”It won’t be too long now… Read More ›