The man who walked out on Prime Minister Kevin Rudd’s apology to the stolen generation, Peter Dutton, has demanded that all Australians celebrate Australia Day with gusto, or else. ”I, and my good friends at News Corp have decided that… Read More ›
Dark Lord
Dutton Defends Ordering Gold Spinner Rims For Australia’s Tanks
Aspiring Prime Minister (yep, really) the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has defended his record as Defence Minister, claiming that Australia needed tanks with gold spinning rims. ”I will not sit by and have my record besmirched by the Labor party,… Read More ›
Dutton Tells 4 Corners Producers He’ll Release Their Loved Ones Once He Sees The Ratings
Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has told the producers of ABC’s 4 Corners that he will release their loved ones from captivity the moment he sees the ratings for last night’s show. ”It won’t be too long now… Read More ›
ABC’s 4 Corners To Profile Opposition Leader Lord Voldemort
The ABC will tonight air a deep dive into Australian Opposition leader, the Dark Lord Peter Dutton on their flagship A Current Affairs program, 4 Corners. ”Tonight we are hoping to find out what’s really behind the man, who’s allegedly… Read More ›
Dutton Calls Engadine Maccas For Help In Dealing With ScoMo’s Sh*t
Australia’s Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has called the manager of Engadine Maccas for advice on how to clean up the shit left behind by the former PM Scott Morrison. ”The Dark Lord is not averse to reaching… Read More ›
Prime Minister Albo Challenges Dutton To A DJ Off
Australian Prime Minister DJ Albo has challenged Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton to forego debates and instead battle it out on the decks with a DJ off. ”Boofhead and I will debate plenty in parliament over the next… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 