The wife of aspiring Opposition leader Peter Dutton has denied that her husband is a monster who prowls the neighbourhood after dark feeding on small mammals, saying he is just a misunderstood knockabout bloke who loves making dad jokes with… Read More ›
Newspoll
Sky News Polls Their Viewers, All 6 Of Them And Declares ScoMo Will Win
Niche news network Sky News Australia has released polling that they’ve done with their viewers, all 6 of them, that shows Prime Minister Scott Morrison will comfortably win this Saturday’s election. ”Our polls indicate that over 83% of our viewers… Read More ›
Barnaby Calls For More Funding For Future Single Mothers
Aspiring Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce has called for an increase in funding for future single Mothers, in a move that he feels may help the Coalition with their female problem. ”We need to make sure we look after… Read More ›
ScoMo To Use $5 Billion Disaster Relief Fund To Fix His Public Image
Australian Prime Minister (for now) Scott Morrison has pledged to get his hands dirty and dig into the Government’s $5 billion disaster relief fund to help fix his broken public image. ”It hasn’t been an easy couple of years for… Read More ›
Lismore Residents Report PM Missing Following His Disappearance
Worried residents of Lismore have filed a missing persons report with the police following the disappearance of the Prime Minister Scotty from marketing during his alleged visit to the town last week. ”I hope he’s alright, floods can be a… Read More ›
ScoMo Feigns A Cough And Asks Jen If She Can Call The Office And Tell ’em He’s Sick
Australian Prime Minister (for now) Scotty who was fired from marketing has woken up this morning put on a faint cough and asked his wife Jen if she could call the office and tell ’em that he’s sick. ”I’m not… Read More ›