Tinnie Terrorists On Way To Secret Syrian Fishing Spot


Five Melbourne men intercepted in Cape York towing a tinnie have refused to tell authorities the location of where they intended to go fishing.

“If the AFP want to know where the snapper are running they can figure it out for themselves,” said controversial IS supporter Musa Cerantonio after being stopped in the small north Queensland town of Laura. “The feds can waterboard us as much as they like but we’ve taken a vow never to reveal where the sooty grunter are biting.”

“Five individuals have been stopped towing a boat containing balaclavas, false passports, two kilos of prawns and a bucket of burley,” confirmed senior detective Joan Mulloway. “Despite intense questioning the men have refused to tell us where they intended to wet their lines and we have no alternative other than to let them go and endure any bragging they might do in the pub later on about how much fish they’ve been catching.”

Sources within the Australian Federal Police say high ranking officers have become frustrated at not being able to catch any yellowtail at their regular fishing spots and suspected the five men know some really good locations on the upper Euphrates where the ‘kingies’ are plentiful.

“I’m king of glad that the AFP have caught us because we’ve done nothing but play ‘I spy’ for three days since we’ve left home,” said passenger Shayden Thorne, who police believe was responsible for supplying the gang with two cartons of VB for the trip. “There’s only so many times you can say ‘I spy with my little eye something beginning with B’ before everyone knows the answer is going to be ‘beard’.”

Peter Green

You can follow The (un)Australian on twitter or like us on facebook.

Categories: News

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: