Author Archives
I'm a writer, comedian, improviser, actor, photographer, model, critic, commentator, and in my spare time I work full time in a white collar job.
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Vegan Knows Restaurant That Sells ‘The Best Corn’
Gerard Styles, a 22 year old barista from trendy East-Riverton, NSW, has allayed concerns from his non-vegan friends about where they should go for dinner by assuring his companions that he knows a restaurant that sells “the best corn”. Mr… Read More ›
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Avant-Garde Theatre Piece Plans ‘Cutting-Edge New Ways To Bore Audience’
The Sydney University Dramatic Society (SUDS) has announced a run of winter performances for its new experimental play, penned by one of their most promising students, Britt Haynes, entitled The Decameron Diaz. Mr Haynes promises that his play will ‘completely reshape’ the… Read More ›
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Dying Teenager Fails To Teach Community How To Live Again
Residents of Riverton, NSW are reeling following the premature death of Kylie Waters, 16, who passed away as a result of her thyroid cancer before revealing the life lessons she had learned as a direct result of succumbing to such an… Read More ›
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White Teenager Uses ‘N-Word’ In Non-Offensive Context
A white teenager from Williamsburg, Brooklyn has become the first person to use the word “n*****” in a non-offensive context. Julius Cassidy, a 17 year hold highschooler, dropped the racial slur during a conversation with James Williams, an African-American teenager who Mr… Read More ›
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Terrorists Racking Up Large Phone Bills As Patriot Act Expires
Congress has failed to reauthorise several key provisions in the PATRIOT Act, including one of its more controversial passages, Section 215, which authorised the NSA to collect the phone records of millions of potential terrorists, or as they’re more commonly known… Read More ›
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Court Injunction Successfully Stops People Talking About Denis O’Brien’s Relationship With IRBC
Catherine Murphy, an Independent TD (Teachta Dála; member of Dáil Éireann, the lower house of the Oireachtas) has her had comments about the relationship between billionaire Denis O’Brien and Ireland’s former state bank, Irish Bank Resolution Corporation (IRBC) censored… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 