A contrite nuclear physicist at CERN has been severely reprimanded after putting Hot Wheels cars at each end of the Large Hadron Collider and conducting experiments to see if anything cool happens when they crash at high speeds. “We caught… Read More ›
Medical authorities have warned that the popularity of e-cigarettes is leading to a resurgence of wankerhood amongst young users, winding back decades of anti wankerness campaigning. “The evidence is overwhelming that vaping is a gateway to riding around the city… Read More ›
The shrinking size of Wagon Wheels is proof that the universe has stopped expanding, according to Nobel Prize winning physicists working at the Hadron Collider. “Judging by the relative width and thickness of Wagon Wheels, we speculate that the universe… Read More ›
A planned breakout from Long Bay jail has been thwarted after the farewell card for the culprit was accidentally circulated to the guards for signing. “Like any workplace, when someone is about to leave we like to send a card… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 