Aspiring Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce today sent a warning to the Prime Minister that if the contentious bonk ban is not ended then he will stop campaigning in the country and head to the electorate of Wentworth. ”The… Read More ›
Bondi
Barrel Chested Old Coot At Beach Wants You To Guess How Old He Is
That leathery old bloke in speedos who’s always strutting around at the beach wants you to take a shot at guessing how old he is. “How old do you reckon I am?” asked wrinkly beachgoer Bert Vovo as he puffed… Read More ›
Village People Covers Band Devastated By Lockdown Of Construction Workers
NSW-based Village People covers band The Macho Men have been devastated this week, after the NSW Government implemented a ban on all construction workers. ”Mate, this is just devastating,” said the group’s Policeman. ”Already we have lost so much work… Read More ›
Local Coke Dealers Resent Cross Fit Gyms Taking Away Their Clients
Local Cocaine dealers are up in arms after a number of their usual clients have turned their backs on them in favour of joining a cross fit gym. “Ah look mate it’s just not right you know,” said a dealer… Read More ›
Sculptures By The Sea To Be Replaced With A ‘Pop-Up’ Casino On Bondi Beach
This year’s sculptures by the sea event will close a week early due to storm damage and be replaced by a pop-up casino that will run the length of Bondi Beach. The announcement was made by New South Wales Premier… Read More ›
Australia Adopts New Zealand Style Social Service System By Moving Everyone On Welfare To Bondi
Australia has taken note of New Zealand’s successful social welfare system and is following suit by making everyone currently on the dole go and live in Bondi. “New Zealand hardly has any unemployment and a low welfare budget due to… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 