NRL Boss Peter V’landys has ordered Prime Minister Scott Morrison to arrange for the nation’s school kids to sit in the stands during this weekend’s round of rugby league matches. ”We’ve been told it’s safe for kids to go to… Read More ›
Sport
“Anti-Dickhead Vaccine Still At Least 12 Months Away” Say Desperate NRL Scientists
Development of a vaccine to stop rugby league players acting like dickheads off the field is still more than twelve months away and may never be discovered, despondent NRL scientists reported yesterday. “We’re afraid that NRL players may have to… Read More ›
NRL To Sell Small Team Colour Coffins For Unvaccinated Kiddies
The NRL have announced today a new line of merchandise to be launched to coincide with the restart of the season, small team colour coffins for the unvaccinated children in the family. “We’ve seen a lot of talk about a… Read More ›
Cricket Australia Outlaws Using Spit to Shine Ball: Opts For Sand Paper Instead
Cricket Australia chief Kevin Roberts flagged a flurry of new rules for cricket in reaction to the COVID-19 crisis that has hit the sport. Roberts has suggested practices such as using spit to shine a ball need to be replaced… Read More ›
Gold Coast Titans Unveil Spotted Jersey For NRL Anti-Vax Round
Gold Coast Titans rugby league players have proudly modeled the special spotted uniform they will be wearing in the NRL’s upcoming anti-vaxxer round. “We’re proud that a bunch of blokes mainly known for their ability to take a series of… Read More ›
Magpies Postpone Swooping Season Till December
Faced with the possibility that the streets will still be bare of people in September, Australia’s magpies have reluctantly pushed back the swooping season to December. “What’s the point of swooping season if there’s no-one to swoop down on but… Read More ›
