Channel 7 has today announced that they will be ditching the kids hospital telethon in favour of a more worthy cause, male survivors of defamation lawsuits.

”What sort of World do we live in, when good wholesome chaps like Bruce and Ben risk losing everything,” said a Channel 7 Insider. ”I mean we tried to help little Brucey out with some rent money and everyone went ballistic.”

”They threatened to strip us of our Walkeley.”

When asked why the Channel was going out of their way to help two people who brought the defamation suits upon themselves, the Channel 7 Insider said: ”Well how else were they supposed to clear their names?”

”Not like we could wheel little Brucey out on Dancing With The Stars without some sort of court win.”

”And dear Ben needs all the cash he can get. Living in the Hague isn’t cheap you know.”

The telethon will air Christmas eve and be hosted by Darryl Somers. With appearances from the Cash Cow, Plucka Duck and David Koch who will be singing a medley of hits from his favourite band, Limp Bizkit.”

Mark Williamson

@MWChatShow

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Categories: Media

Tags: Attorney General, auspol, Ben Roberts Smith, Bruce Lehrmann, Channel 7, Darryl Somers, David Koch, Defamation, Kerry Stokes, law, Limp Bizkit, Plucka Duck, satire, Sydney, Telethon