Alarm clocks and phones have been heard ringing around Toorak, Mosman and the Mornington Peninsula this morning as some of Australia’s worst people have gotten up early to watch the Presidential inauguration.

”What a great day for the World, President Trump, brings a tear to the eye,” said low-rating TV host Andrew Bolt. ”I tell you, getting up early was totally worth it, as I am now definitely awake but not woke.”

”That’s a good one, eh, might use it tonight on the show.”

When asked what could be in store for Australia under a Trump Presidency, Andrew Bolt said: ”It will be glorious, there will be lefty tears flowing and the inner-city elites will be put in their place.”

”President Trump will refresh the World by making sure no one is woke.”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some of my fan club coming over to celebrate and need to buy a six-pack of beer to share with them.”

Mark Williamson

@MWChatShow

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Categories: World

Tags: Andrew Bolt, auspol, Australians For Trump, Circle Jerk, Donald Trump, Inauguration, Mornington, Mosman, Paul Murray, Peta Credlin, President, President Trump, President-Elect, Sky News, The Bolt Report, Toorak