Author Archives
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Sydney Faces Crash In Conversations About Housing Prices
The amount of conversations about housing prices reached a 10-year low at barbecues all around Sydney on the weekend, a sign that the housing conversation boom may be over. “Spring is usually the peak time for wankers to boast about… Read More ›
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Fake Email Claims Dave Sharma Is Member Of Liberal Party
The dirty tricks employed in the Wentworth by-election campaign have sunk even lower after voters were sent a fake email that linked candidate Dave Sharma to the Liberal Party. “This is a crude effort to discredit me, definitely the work… Read More ›
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Sydney Light Rail To Be Completed One Day After Entropic Death Of Universe
The projected completion date of the 12 kilometer Sydney light rail project has been pushed back to one day after the heat death of the universe, in approximately 10100 years from next Wednesday. “Commuters enjoying a 35 minute faster journey… Read More ›
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NSW Government To Project Advertising Onto Side Of Opera Singers
The Prime Minister has praised plans to allow advertising to be projected onto the sides of opera singers, saying why not use the biggest billboard in the city. “There are acres of unused space on the sides of your average… Read More ›
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Heroic Roosters Fan Watches Entire Grand Final With Broken Chardy Glass
The biggest secret of the NRL Grand Final has been revealed after victors the Sydney Roosters admitted that their biggest fan had inspiringly watched the entire game whilst concealing that the stem on his wine glass had snapped. “I’d actually… Read More ›
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Australian Males Baffled By Purpose Of Strange Object Found In Strawberries
Men throughout Australia are continuing to investigate what might the purpose be of the mysterious pointy metallic objects that keep being found inside strawberries. “It’s a shortish sliver of steel with a hole at end that tapers to a quite… Read More ›