Author Archives
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Motorist Refrains From Honking Horn
In a stunning turn of events a motorist in Sydney’s CBD didn’t honk his horn after being momentarily inconvenienced by another motorist. Robert Prendergast was near the beginning of his journey home from work when he was unable to proceed… Read More ›
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Donnelly To Pyne: ‘Cage All Schoolchildren’
The federal government’s controversial education reviewer, Dr Kevin Donnelly has recommended all schoolchildren be caged as part of a wide-ranging review of discipline in the nation’s public schools. The former teacher and ex-Liberal party staffer says incarceration needs to be… Read More ›
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Pauline Hanson Officially Halal Certified
Former Dancing With The Stars contestant, fish and chip shop owner and member of parliament, Pauline Hanson, has today been officially Halal certified, a move which has outraged Hanson and mightily confused her legions of followers. Hanson was initially perplexed… Read More ›
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Andrew Bolt Compares Jesus To Reclaim Australia, Jesus To Sue For Defamation
Jesus Christ of Nazareth will be pursuing a defamation suit against Andrew Bolt after the controversial columnist compared the former carpenter to reviled figures including the Reclaim Australia protesters, a spokesperson for the Kingdom of God has confirmed. Channel 10,… Read More ›
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Pub Bore Stabbed After Being Dared To Say ‘Good Friday Isn’t That Good’ Again
The most boring man in Erskineville died from the 36 stab wounds he received at The Erko on Thursday night after repeatedly attempting to get plaudits for his annual Good Friday joke[sic]. There were up to 200 people in the main bar at… Read More ›
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James Hird Puts Tour De France Dream On Hold, For Now
Coach of AFL side Essendon and possibly the Australian legal profession’s greatest benefactor, James Hird, has today announced he’ll be putting his dream of riding the Tour de France on hold so he can focus his full attention on coaching… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 