Author Archives
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Bill Shorten Tipped To Knife Himself After Disastrous Polling
Opposition leader Bill Shorten, a man who lists the musical Sweeney Todd as his greatest inspiration, is rumoured to be pondering the idea of knifing himself as leader of the Australian Labor Party (ALP) and replacing himself, bizarrely, with himself…. Read More ›
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Netanyahu Blames Palestinians For Assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand
Israel’s Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has been criticised for saying a Palestinian leader persuaded Gavrilo Princip to assassinate Austrian Archduke Franz Ferdinand in 1914. Mr Netanyahu insisted the Serbian nationalist Princip had only wanted to “give the high-and-mighty duke a… Read More ›
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Bill Shorten Disappointed Malcolm Turnbull Won’t Play Richie Rich In ALP Production
Federal opposition leader Bill Shorten is disappointed that his approach to Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull to play the role of Richie Rich in an upcoming Australian Labor Party production was rebuffed. Mr Turnbull declined the offer to play the cartoon… Read More ›
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AFL Club ‘Filthy’ Over Draft Pick Compensation For Discarded Pair Of Footy Socks
An AFL club (take no notice of the picture) has gone to the AFL Commission to complain that they were not offered a higher draft pick as compensation for discarding a pair of used footy socks as part of their… Read More ›
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Factory Workers Of Australia Report Prime Minister Missing To Police
The Australian Association of Factory Workers have today gone to the police to report the Prime Minister of Australia missing as no one has seen him visit a factory, farm or processing plant in over a month. A similar report… Read More ›
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George Brandis Accidentally Blows $131 000 000 Metadata Support Fund On Candy Crush Boosters
Attorney-General George Brandis has today announced that “The Government is supporting the telecommunications industry to the tune of $131 million to assist it in its data retention operations.” Senator Brandis argued that ISPs have no excuses not to be ready…. Read More ›
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