Factory Workers Of Australia Report Prime Minister Missing To Police

malcolm turnbull

The Australian Association of Factory Workers have today gone to the police to report the Prime Minister of Australia missing as no one has seen him visit a factory, farm or processing plant in over a month. A similar report was also filed by the company responsible for producing hi-vis workwear, following a dip in sales.

A spokesperson for the Australian Association of Factory Workers told The (un)Australian: “We are very worried for the Prime Minister’s safety, up until a month ago our members would regularly see the PM visiting one of their factories decked out in a hi-vis jacket with a throng of media in tow.

“But lately we have not seen the Prime Minister near a factory at all, the closest he’s come to a blue collar worker was when he sat opposite an Irish labourer on the Watson’s Bay ferry.”

When contacted for comment, the Prime Minister’s office said: “The PM is fine and not ‘missing’, he just has a lot on his plate and will endeavour to get out to a factory or a farm or a boutique micro brewery in the very near future, most likely a little closer to the election.”

Former prime minister Tony Abbott has been keeping up with his factory visits. But instead of turning up with a media throng and talking points, he has instead been handing out his resume.

Mark Williamson
www.twitter.com/MW__Oh

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