Author Archives

• Hot Rich White People Gather For Annual Conference

  By theunozblog on 23/02/2015

  

  The hottest richest white people on the planet are gathering in Hollywood this morning to congratulate themselves on another year of showing the rest of the world how accurate Karl Marx’s predictions were. The annual conference is held in downtown… Read More ›

• Exclusive: Abbott’s Original Terror Draft Leaked

  By theunozblog on 23/02/2015

  

  With Prime Minister Tony Abbott addressing Parliament to announce a new ‘security crackdown’ focussing on immigration, citizenship status and access to welfare to combat terrorism, The (un)Australian can exclusively reveal the contents of of Mr Abbott’s unedited proposals. Despite several opportunities for… Read More ›

• Australian Census To Be Replaced By Family Feud

  By theunozblog on 20/02/2015

  

  The Prime Minister has announced that the Australian Census will be replaced by episodes of Family Feud.  ‘I have two words for you,’ said Mr. Abbott rearranging deck chairs. ‘Survey Says!’ The Prime Minister has stated that the 104 year… Read More ›

• Philip Ruddock Sends Tony Abbott Shipment Of Nanna’s Berries

  By theunozblog on 19/02/2015

  

  Rumours of bad blood between Prime Minister Tony Abbott and the Father of the House Philip Ruddock following Mr Ruddock’s resignation as chief government whip have been all but dispelled after the Member for Berowra sent Mr Abbott a sizeable quantity of… Read More ›

• Barry O’Farrell Can’t Recall Anything After Accepting A Drink From A Young Lib At A Uni Party

  By theunozblog on 19/02/2015

  

  The faltering memory of former NSW premier Barry O’Farrell has again made headlines after he confessed he could not remember anything at all since a university party back in the late 1970s when a Young Liberal offered him a drink. The famously forgetful O’Farrell resigned… Read More ›

• Tony Abbott To Send Malcolm Turnbull To Mars

  By theunozblog on 18/02/2015

  

  Prime Minister Tony Abbott has secretly entered Communcations Minister Malcolm Turnbull into the final shortlist of 100 people to go on the first manned mission to Mars. Insiders say that Mr Turnbull wasn’t consulted. “That’s not exactly true,” the prime minister… Read More ›