While the Ford champagne corks were popping during Chaz Mostert’s thrilling Bathurst 500 win last October, a terrible tragedy quietly took place in the Red Bull Racing team stables. Against the advice of the trainer and team vets, Jamie Whincup thrashed the Holden… Read More ›
News
George Brandis Arrives in Bankstown, Declares Terra Nullius
The Western Sydney suburb of Bankstown was yesterday declared to be Terra Nullius following its discovery by Attorney General George Brandis on Monday. Minister Brandis QC, who is also a Senator, found that there was no evidence of a pre-existing… Read More ›
Anti-Halloween Man Laments Lack Of Trick Or Treaters To Lecture
Matthew Bridge, a 33-year-old man from Marrickville, Sydney, was well-prepared for any local kids out trick-or treating on Friday evening, but was gravely disappointment at being denied the chance to deliver a lecture on “the insidious growth of American cultural… Read More ›
Panic As David Cameron Accidently Brushes Against Commoner
Panic erupted among security for British Prime Minister David Cameron yesterday when the Conservative Party leader accidentally brushed against a commoner. The incident occurred after a major security lapse caused the PM to walk down a street that included an actual… Read More ›
Abbott To Shirtfront Comets After Early-Warning System Closed By Cuts
Australians need not worry about the threat of a comet hitting Earth, Prime Minister Tony Abbott told The (Un)Australian, because he was prepared to “shirtfront” any rock from outer space that “sought to illegally cross our borders”. The comment came… Read More ›
Russia, Qld And NSW Outraged As Abbott Threatens To ‘Shirt front’ Putin
Tony Abbott has caused widespread outrage over his threat to “shirt front” Russian President Vladimir Putin at the G20 meeting over the shooting down of flight MH17, with a Russian government spokesperson expressing strong condemnation and confusion over why Austria… Read More ›