Local Cocaine dealers are up in arms after a number of their usual clients have turned their backs on them in favour of joining a cross fit gym. “Ah look mate it’s just not right you know,” said a dealer… Read More ›
Cocaine
Australia’s Coke Dealers Call For A Bail Out Package Following The Implementation Of The Election Advertising Blackout
Australia’s coke dealers have called on which ever party wins Saturday’s election to put together a bail out package for the struggling industry following the implementation of the election advertising blackout. “Mate last week everything was gravy, old mate Palmer… Read More ›
Ray Hadley’s Anger Over Father Of The Year Snubbing
Shock jock Ray Hadley has launched a blistering attack on the organisers of the Australian Father of the year award after he was left off the short list of finalists. “Can you believe the hide on these people, how dare… Read More ›
Cocaine Industry In Shock After Logies Leave Melbourne
Up to 5000 jobs may be lost in the Victorian cocaine industry in the wake of the state government’s decision to no longer fund the annual TV Week Logie Awards. “Daniel Andrews obviously has no idea how important the cocaine… Read More ›
Aussie Teen Disgraced After Bali Police Clear Him Of Drug Possession
An embarrassed Aussie teen is desperately trying to save his reputation as a cool guy after being humiliatingly cleared of drug possession during a schoolies week trip to Bali. “That was so a massive bag of evil drugs that I… Read More ›
NRL Praises Cronulla’s Improvement In Quality Of Off -Field Scandals
The NRL has issued a statement commending the 2016 Premiership winning Cronulla Sharks for lifting not only on-field but off-field in the aftermath of Cronulla player Ben Barba’s sacking for cocaine use. A spokesperson for the NRL told The (un)Australian about Cronulla: “What a… Read More ›
