Nation’s Drug Dealers Call For Government Bailout Following Fashion Week’s Cancellation


The Nation’s drug dealers have called upon the federal Government to put together a bailout package for the industry, following the news that Australian fashion week had been cancelled due to the Covid-19 pandemic.

“Mate this is an absolute disaster,” said an Industry Spokesperson. “Fashion week accounts for 60% of my yearly income.”

“How am I going to pay the school fees? Or the mortgage on my investment property.

When asked what the Government could do to help stimulate the drug dealing industry, the Spokesperson said: “We need an investment of funds to not only tide us over but to maybe help some of the younger guys re-train.”

“A lot of people dismiss drug dealers as an unskilled profession, but that’s just not fair. We are very skilled people and given the chance could thrive in any cut-throat profession, like Real Estate or Politics.”

No word yet on what packages the Government will draw up for the drug dealers.

Mark Williamson


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