The NSW Government is again resisting calls for beer testing at major sporting events following the deaths of five middle aged men at a BBL match who consumed an unconfirmed brown liquid. Pleas from medical and legal advocates, as well… Read More ›
Drugs
Ray Hadley’s Anger Over Father Of The Year Snubbing
Shock jock Ray Hadley has launched a blistering attack on the organisers of the Australian Father of the year award after he was left off the short list of finalists. “Can you believe the hide on these people, how dare… Read More ›
Sports Commentator Reminds Us To Always Use Heroin Responsibly
Viewers of the National Crab Soccer League are being constantly reminded to always use heroin responsibly after the league completed a multi million dollar sponsorship deal with Australia’s largest heroin dealer. “And don’t forget, always shoot up in a responsible… Read More ›
Healthy Harold Stumbles Out Of Club At 4am After Celebrating Funding Restoration
Much loved health education mascot Healthy Harold has been arrested after a long night bingeing on alcoholic shots, donuts and illicit drugs following the news that his planned budget cut has been reversed. “We were following up reports that a… Read More ›
Barnaby Joyce’s Speechwriter Admits He Can’t Work Without A Puff Of Whacky Backy And Six Schooies
Barnaby Joyce’s head speechwriter has confessed that he can’t start work until he’s pulled a few cones and thrown down half a dozen schooners of beer. “Barnaby’s speeches may look disorganised and off the cuff but they are actually intricately… Read More ›
Hanson Holds Press Call in Mosman To Show Drug Addiction Rates Are Overstated
One Nation Leader (despite what Rod Culleton has been saying) Pauline Hanson has today held a press call in the affluent Sydney suburb of Mosman to prove that the level of drug addiction stated by the Greens is vastly over… Read More ›
