Viewers of the National Crab Soccer League are being constantly reminded to always use heroin responsibly after the league completed a multi million dollar sponsorship deal with Australia’s largest heroin dealer. “And don’t forget, always shoot up in a responsible… Read More ›
Much loved health education mascot Healthy Harold has been arrested after a long night bingeing on alcoholic shots, donuts and illicit drugs following the news that his planned budget cut has been reversed. “We were following up reports that a… Read More ›
Barnaby Joyce’s head speechwriter has confessed that he can’t start work until he’s pulled a few cones and thrown down half a dozen schooners of beer. “Barnaby’s speeches may look disorganised and off the cuff but they are actually intricately… Read More ›
One Nation Leader (despite what Rod Culleton has been saying) Pauline Hanson has today held a press call in the affluent Sydney suburb of Mosman to prove that the level of drug addiction stated by the Greens is vastly over… Read More ›
An embarrassed Aussie teen is desperately trying to save his reputation as a cool guy after being humiliatingly cleared of drug possession during a schoolies week trip to Bali. “That was so a massive bag of evil drugs that I… Read More ›
Following threats from the IOC to kick it out of the Rio Olympics, the Russian Olympic team is having serious second thoughts about its decision to hire Stephen Dank to oversee its supplements program. “Dr Dank injected our athletes with… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 