Residents of small resort towns all over Australia are making disaster plans to deal with the influx of posh wankers who normally choof off overseas for a holiday at this time of year. “We’ve survived drought, bushfires, floods and coronavirus… Read More ›
COVID-19
Magpies Postpone Swooping Season Till December
Faced with the possibility that the streets will still be bare of people in September, Australia’s magpies have reluctantly pushed back the swooping season to December. “What’s the point of swooping season if there’s no-one to swoop down on but… Read More ›
ScoMo Tells Gladys That There’ll Be No Mask Wearing In Bunnings This Weekend
Australian Prime Minister Scotty from Hillsong’s marketing department has told NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian that there’ll be no compulsory wearing of masks in Bunnings this weekend. ”Gladys and her team are the ruby standard when it comes to handling the… Read More ›
Byron Shire Chosen As Location For Australia’s First 6G Tower
It has been announced that the Byron Shire located on NSW’s North Coast has been chosen as the first place in the world to trial the new 6G technology, with plans to install towers in the coming months. “We understand… Read More ›
Barnaby Calls For Vic Premier To Allow Exemptions To Lock Down For Those Wishing To Bonk
Former deputy Prime Minister and aspiring Minister for Affairs Barnaby Joyce has called on the Victorian Premier Dan Andrews to ease restrictions in the State to allow people from interstate to visit those they wish to bonk. “I understand that… Read More ›
Kelly Gang Commended For Wearing Masks
Dan Andrews has praised outlaw Ned Kelly and his gang for following the correct mask wearing protocol while going about their business of robbing banks and ranging about in the bush. “I watched the video Ned put up on YouTube… Read More ›