Former Prime Minister (yep, really) Tony Abbott, has demanded that current Prime Minister, Anthony Albanese, send the army over to the UK to help track down Princess Kate. ”A strong monarchy makes a strong Australia,” said Mr Rabbit. ”Albo needs… Read More ›
onions
Morrison Appoints Abbott As Special Envoy To Bunnings To Sort Out The Onion Mess
Prime Minister (as at the time of writing this article) Scott Morrison has taken time out of the ASEAN conference to deal with the domestic crisis of onions in Bunnings sausages by appointing former Prime Minister Tony Abbott as Special… Read More ›
Shorten Sends Abbott A Thank You Bouquet Of Onions For Taking The Heat Off Of Him
Opposition leader (for now) Bill Shorten has sent former Prime Minister Tony Abbott a thank you bouquet of onions after the former Prime Minister took off some of the heat on Shorten by attacking the current Prime Minister over the… Read More ›
Onion Lobby Mourning Loss Of ‘Our Greatest Champion’
“We’ve lost our greatest advocate,” Onions Australia CEO Lynn Bulb said over the dramatic events this week that saw conservative prime minister and renowned onion lover Tony Abbott replaced by Malcolm Turnbull, whose attitude to the vegetable remains untested. “You’d… Read More ›
Abbott In Pay Of Big Onion: Exclusive Report
Tony Abbott is working as a secret representative of Australia’s powerful Onion Lobby, The (un)Australian can exclusively reveal as part of a year-long investigation. The revelation came after Abbott caused world-wide headlines by chomping directly into a raw onion during a… Read More ›