The Last Hobbit Film, Five Armies, To Be Split Into Five Separate Films

the hobbit

Peter Jackson, director of the wildly successful movie adaptations of JRR Tolkien’s thinly veiled racist allegories, has announced this week that the final instalment of The Hobbit will be made into five separate films.

Each movie will  run for approximately three hours and an extended director’s cut will be available on Blu-ray which is expected to last the course of your natural life.

The Hobbit, already the first film adaptation of a novel that actually takes more time to finish than the novel itself, is a labour of love for Jackson as he told The (un)Australian.

“I love money!” said Jackson, “and people keep coming to see these movies no matter how much I pad them out with singing dwarves, walking scenes and wizard flashbacks of previously shown footage.”

Before adding, “At one point in the third film, we’re going to have a flashback that’s basically just the entire first movie.”

The announcement was met with mixed reactions from fans and critics. Long-time devotee of the series Edward Brent said, “I was just a boy when the first Lord of the Rings came out, it’s good to know they’ll still be going long after I’m dead.”

Film critic Humphrey Charlesington toldTthe (un)Australian, “I’ve been paid a lot of money to give these movies at least four stars in my reviews,” before adding, “four stars from me.”

The (un)Australian asked Jackson what his plans were after the series is completed.

He winked and said “It’ll never be over.”

Ryan Crawford

Twitter: @RyanTheCrawford

 

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Categories: Arts, Media

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