New Fifty Shades Of Grey Manuscript Stolen; Returned Immediately

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In the lead up to the launch of the new book by the author of the critically acclimatised novel 50 Shades of Grey, a manuscript of the book has been stolen.

The publisher fears the copy may be leaked before the launch of Grey, resulting in the loss of millions in sales revenue. The new novel is apparently a prequel and an account of the first novel from Christian Grey’s perspective.

Publishing agent Prue Jenson told The (un)Australian: “It’s not the first time a prized manuscript has been stolen, but it is the first time a piece of garbage like this has been.

“I don’t know what’s more morally outrageous, that the thief stole the manuscript or that thief might have actually read the accursed thing.”

Fears were allayed however when the manuscript turned up the next morning at the front desk of the publishing house. It had a note appended to it reading, “please god no don’t do this”.

In the short time before the manuscript was returned, police had been given extracts from the novel in order to aid in tracking it down. Of the three officers exposed to the text, two of them are currently on leave suffering post-traumatic stress disorder but the third one was fine. It was later revealed that he couldn’t read.

Ryan Crawford
http://www.twitter.com/ryanthecrawford

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